Dear black animal shadow thing I saw in the corner of my eye- in my backyard- as you went into a hole,
I think you are a snake, and you've ruined my afternoon on the deck. K says he is ok with having a black snake running around the back yard, but I am not. You see, you remind me of lizards, and we aren't even going there. I am afraid that you will climb up the deck and do something terrible. Like
bite eat me.
K says black snakes don't bite. Of course, you could be a mole or a chipmunk. And that would be alright, I guess. But I fear the worst. I'm apprehensive to let my feet hang off the couch, in fear that you are now in my house somehow, under my couch, waiting to have my heels for lunch. It's possible because I had all of the doors and windows open.
Yike. So now, all of the doors are closed. And locked.
Just in case you grew legs and wanted to open the door. Aren't you supposed to be hibernating or something? I googled "hole in my backyard" and they all look like snake holes to me.
So. Please go next door with your slivery self and your holes. My neighbor has a pool. Don't you like those? I also live near a highway. Feel free to go straight out my back fence, down the hill and into the road. Thank you.
Until Next Time,
The Guff
you are a nut.
ReplyDeletei don't get near snakes in the road for fear they will leap into my car's engine and when i get out they will be waiting for me.
I think googling "hole" in my back yard is the funniest thing today. And as you know, therre's stiff competition for that.
ReplyDeleteFortunately, a 5-year-old administering an inhaler to a 3-year-old is NOT in the funny category...or you might have been a runner-up.
Hahaha... The image of you googling "hole in my backyard". Excellent.
ReplyDeleteI HATE and am TERRIFIED of snakes. Like have nightmares about them every now and then. I would NOT be ok with one, not matter what type/non-biting species in my backyard either!
Rabbits have holes too!! Maybe it is a rabbit snake...uh..don't google that!! I love you!!
ReplyDelete