Am I really stupid, or is this normal?

Long story short:

This morning, I stopped to get gas on the way to work.
I pulled the nozzle out of the tank without letting the latch go. (Why?)
It stuck.
I bathed in gasoline.
I screamed.
A lot.
I stunk.

I drove back home, stripped in the laundry room -from my headband to my cute red flats- and started the morning all over again.
Once I got home from work, I went to wash the clothes again (I could still smell gasoline from the front door; I'm telling you, it was bad.) Annnd... this is what I found:



Remind me why I thought suede and leather (and, come to find out, cardboard) shoes would bode well in that kind of environment? Ugh. I'm stupid.

Until Next Time,
The Guff

I AM NOT READY!!!

16 WEEKS & COUNTING!

So, I am 24 weeks now! And, I discovered the beginnings of stretch marks on my boobs yesterday (and cried) and my belly button is doing something funny. I know, TMI. But seriously. I have been using the Tummy Butter often, and my tummy looks great...-ish. No one felt like telling me my boobs would have stretch marks? Gross. I made K pick up some Palmer's lotion for the duo today. Hopefully I can get to them before it sticks. Egh. And my belly button... What. is going on? I thought for a minute that it was gonna pop- it had become a little shallow. Now, out of nowhere, it looks...sideways... Weird, huh? It looks wider and... deep again. OK? It's weird. Enough of that.

We went to the doctor yesterday and it was an interesting trip. We got to hear our little girl's hiccups and strong, amazing heartbeat. We met with an awesome midwife who had a lot of great things to say and advice to give. I will let you in on the fact that I totally freaked in the room. I guess it was because she put things into perspective for me. She made me realize that it really isn't that long until our little hoot arrives!!! She asked a lot of great questions, (One was: "What is your birth plan?" to which I answered, "To push her out." Appropriate?) and I guess I got a little overwhelmed. I have been reading week-to-week things, and post-partum things, but have done no research about labor and delivery and vaccines and pediatricians and so on... So, when she started spouting off these things back to back and I had not made any decisions yet... I just started to cry. It's what I do. She was great, even when I started blabbing something to the effect of, "I'm just not ready! I don't know what I am going to do, I don't have enough time left! I have so much to read!" K sat there, jaw dropped and terrified, I'm sure. I can only imagine that he was thinking something like, "Please stop crying. We are more ready than you think. Don't let this lady think we, er, I am crazy." She calmed me down saying that I was insane (KIDDING!) and that it was normal for me not to have the answers yet, and that's why she was bringing it up. She does not understand. I am always prepared. I always have things figured out and planned weeks ahead of time. This is unacceptable. Yike!

Out of the 7, yes, 7 pounds that I have gained throughout this pregnancy (all in the last month, mind you) 1 & 1/2 of them are Little Miss Chamblee. I can't believe she weighs that much! So cool! ---Sidenote--- she has been kicking and punching and flipping constantly for about 2 hours. K finally got to feel a few really good kicks, and lost it. We laughed and I cried, WEIRD, and we laughed some more. It blows my mind how much she has enhanced the love and laughter in our home already. I simply can't imagine how often and to what degree she will do that for the rest of our lives. It consumes me.

Back to the 7 pounds. Remember when I was rude and talked about how I hadn't gained any weight? Yeah, that's history. I am having serious, serious addiction issues with peanut butter M&Ms. It has gotten so bad that I only allow myself to eat them at certain times throughout the day. 10:00, 12:00, 2:00 and 4:00 (Shut it.) Otherwise there would be none left in the stores. Hence the 7 pounds...

I have 3 wonderful and very generous friends who are throwing us a baby shower in June!!! I got really excited today thinking about having all of the closest people to us, who already love our little girl, in the same place to celebrate her pending arrival. It is going to be so great! It means so very much to me that I have so many kind and loving people surrounding me that I know love her a great deal- ALREADY! And, I guess this means we should register... soon...



OMG I can't believe this is a picture of a 24-week baby. And...do you see her path to the outside world? How in the dump is she gonna fit?! Just sayin'...

Until Next Time,
The Guff

Poke...Push... WHAT IS THAT?!?

This morning, while sitting at my desk, Chamblee was kicking- hard. It wasn't painful or anything, it was just like, "Dang, girl, are you trying to get my attention or WHAT!" Enough to make me sit up straight in my chair and look down at my belly. Just as I looked down I saw something. My shirt moved. Waiiit a minute. It's too early to see her move, I thought. So I sat there with my hand on my tummy and smiled. I'll just sit here and enjoy the hard kicks. WHOAAAAAAAAA! WHAT WAS THAT? My hand visibly moved when she kicked me again- probably thinking something like, "Mom, you idiot! You saw me move! Watch me do it again! Watch!" For about 30 minutes I sat at my desk and stared south. It happened over and over again. Each time I gasped OUT LOUD and got overwhelmed with giggles when my bump would poke left and then poke right. It truly is like there is a little alien in there- I just love it! I could not. stop. laughing! I can't believe that she is so big that I can see and feel her moving around already. This weekend will mark 24 weeks! 24 WEEKS?! That means only 16 weeks until my due date?! 16 weeks ago I was just getting started on this blog... has it been that long? Oh My Nervous. That's not a lot of time to prepare. >Begin Panic Attack<

Know what I keep doing that's really annoying? Ok. Our mini-kitchen and our bathroom at work are on the same hall. Every time I go to toast a bagel or re-fill my water I walk into the bathroom and stand there for a good 10-15 seconds. Then I realize that (for once) I don't have to pee, and there's food in my hand. GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM! THERE'S FOOD IN YOUR HANDS! It's getting kind of old.

Well, tomorrow is the day! I fly out for the big SD bright and early tomorrow morning. Just so you know- I hate flying. I am the girl on the plane who cries, grabs strangers' hands, and panics most of the time we are in the air. If I look calm, I have likely swallowed a couple of xanax and can't remember where I am... kidding... kidding. I totally know where I am. Anyhoos, I realize today that (1) I'm pregnant and I can't take any xanax (2) I AM GOING TO FREAK OUT ON THE PLANE. So, I did what every pregnant, traveling mother does...I called my doctor and begged for a safe sedative. She told me that I couldn't take anything. Thanks for nothing, Suzanne. Well, I'm not going down without a fight...no pun intended... I have decided that I am going to stay up ALL NIGHT tonight (8th grade sleepover style) so tomorrow I will be SO tired. I will naturally knock myself out. I probably won't even know that I am flying. Maybe I'll think I am dreaming it. This could very well backfire. I could be grumpy and cry all day about stupid things. Wait... I currently do that. Anyway, It's a 50/50 chance and I'm taking it!

California Here I come!

Until Next Time,
The Guff

While the Kat's away...

So, I dropped K off at the airport this morning. Boo. I cried the whole way home, as I usually do, and then I was fine after a nap and some serious pool time. Something about that sunshine...

I normally wouldn't announce this information on a public blog, but (1) no one i don't know really reads this thing (thank you, tracker for keeping me posted) and (2) I have an armed bodyguard. Ha! No, I'm serious. K is very protective of me while he's out of town. Even though it is probably because I am a sissy and pout about it, he likes to make it out to be his idea to ask our dear friends to stay over with me while he's away. The bodyguard for this week is packing heat. Yesssssssss. Hefy is like a bestie and we have a lot of fun together (He would die if he read this...). We'll probably play a bunch of Wii and devour my macaroni stash- box by box. He's a true gun-lover and I hate guns. I don't hate them... I'm just scared of them. But I trust him with them...I guess... :/
Anyway, K is only gone until Thursday...which is the day I am flying out for...

SAN DIEGO!!!

There has been so much going on lately that I haven't even had time to freak out publicly about my upcoming trip! My mom gets in town Wednesday, and Thursday morning we fly out bright and early for LA to meet my big sis. This trip has been a long time coming, and I CAN'T WAIT. It's good that while K is gone, I have something to look forward to and plenty of time to try on outfits and pack to the T. It also means that I won't see him for a WHOLE WEEK. I can't even blog about it. Ugh. Thankfully I won't be sitting around pouting- I'll be in SAN DIEGO! with my GIRLS! :) It is going to be so so so nice.

I will now talk about food.
I can't stop eating!!! I don't know if I'm just bored... but I don't think so. It's like I am never full. Ever. I could eat all day. The other morning we went to Chik-Fil-A for breakfast... I ordered... K laughed at me and said, "There is no way you are going to eat all of that." I shrugged. We got home and I ate. every. bite. I could've gone for seconds. He literally sat there, jaw-dropped, and didn't say a word. I have always been an eater, but this was outrageous. Oh well. Baby is growing, right?!

The no-fun part of being this far along is that the fruit that tells me the size of the baby doesn't change week-to-week anymore. It's by month. The fun part is that there are only 4 of those left!!! :) Whoa. I'm about to be a parent. Hooray!

Does anyone have an awesome devotional that they LOVE? I need a new one. Recommendations appreciated.

Until Next Time,
The Guff

Home Brew

The past few weeks have been all about beer. Not for me, of course. K and a good friend of ours (some of you may know as Hefy) decided to brew their own beer. It's something that K has been interested in for a while, and after seeing (and tasting) my brother's success in home brewing, he finally decided to get into it. So, they bought a kit, and set up shop at Hefy's house... a mere 100 yards away. We have been checking on the "bubbling" and saving bottles for a while. Thursday night was the night- time to bottle up their brew! It's actually a lot longer of a process than I imagined. It takes weeks! Even after the beer is bottled, the bottles have to sit in the dark at a certain temperature for about a week. So, Thursday we went over to Hefy's and did the job. By "we" I mean the boys did it while I drank O'Douls and played Wii bowling:) I tried to get some shots of every step- stripping labels, sanitizing, siphoning, bottling, capping and tasting. Yep, I tried it! ...just a little. It's not ready yet, but it was really good! We have to give it time to sit and carbonate, but from what I could tell- huge success!!! I'm really proud of K.
Hooray Beer!

Until Next TIme,
The Guff

I am that girl.

I am that girl. You know, that pregnant girl you see out in public and think to yourself, "Ugh. get it together girl. I will never dress like that when I'm pregnant. I will be so cute when I'm pregnant." Right. Get pregnant, then come talk to me. You know what I caught myself wearing the other day? (yes, "caught myself" because I honestly didn't think 2ce about it) K wanted to go for a walk. I was wearing maternity khaki shorts, socks and one of his undershirts when he asked (I don't even know how it got that far...). What did I do? Slipped on my black Crocs. That's it. Really? Can you please visualize this? Long, elastic shorts, an oversized pocket Hanes tee, nasty (probably unwashed) ponytail, white ankle socks (yes, Nay Nay, ankle socks) and black Crocs. Wow. When I got out in the sun I immediately looked down and wished I had at the very least worn flip flops. Time out. That's all I wished that I had changed? Something is wrong with me. I am that girl. Today in Kroger I found my tank top riding up and my little gut hanging out. Awk.Ward.

My shoes aren't really fitting. I mean, my feet aren't swollen or anything, but my shoes don't fit. Well, maybe my feet are swelling, but not really... I mean, they are still really cute. No kankles as of yet. Ahhh!!! What is wrong with my feet? And all of my pretty skimpy undies have been pushed to the back of the drawer. Sorry K. Granny panties for the next 4 months. Or years. They are actually sooo comfortable. And, who cares about panty lines? I'm pregnant, and I am that girl.

Oh my hot mess. Let me just tell you one of the funniest things in the world. So, K won't let me really do anything. He does, generously, let me carry in the bread from the grocery store from time to time. That's about as far as it gets. I'm not allowed to lift anything, carry anything, push the grocery cart, stand on a step stool, yadda yadda, etc. etc. This weekend, in Nashville, while going to dinner, my friend's boo wanted to drop me off at the front door of the restaurant. So I wouldn't have to walk. From the parking spot. 20 yards away. I was thinking it, and she blurts it out: "She's PREGNANT, not disabled!!!" This has become my motto! My battle cry! I loved it. LOVED it.

Annnd, Cham just kicked me. Actually, she's doing something very karate-ish in there. I felt her move like 10 times in a row! Weird, that's the first time it was really consecutive. Very Neat-o :)

You are in luck. Earlier today I was thinking about writing this blog. I thought of something to write then immediately thought "Oh! TMI! You can't write that!...screw it. Write it." And now I can't remember. Oops. Lucky you.

Does anyone know what a Papaya is? Have you had one? That's how big Baby Guff is this week. We saw them at the grocery store tonight, and they were HUGE. Can't be right. Can't be right, because if it is right, and I am only half way through, I am in trouble. LOTS of trouble. Nothing bigger than the papaya we saw tonight could possibly fit. out. of there.
Especially lots of trouble since I have decided to deliver without an epidural. Call me crazy- but women have done it for thousands of years, and lived to tell about how horrible it was. It can be done and it's natural. I'm all over it.

My brain is tired.

Until Next TIme,
The Guff

Nights in Nashville

Cliff & Mary Brenna got married this weekend and it was awesome! The weekend started off Friday morning with a Bridesmaid's Luncheon and continued through with the Rehearsal, Rehearsal Dinner and Wedding, duh. As I may have mentioned before, I love Nashville. I think another reason that this weekend was so awesome is because all of the locations that were chosen for events were absolutely spectacular. The Rehearsal Dinner was held at Union Station on Broadway- an old train station dating around 100+ years old. It was beautiful. The wedding itself was at the Wightman Chapel in the Scarritt Bennett Center. Everything was so classic and beautiful. Mary Brenna was glowing and took every single person's breath away once she got her dress and veil on. Her veil was made by her grandmother and was just. perfect.
The weather could not have been better and the ceremony could not have been more sweet. The reception was a true party! Their band was awesome, including dance offs (of course K and I participated!) and fabulous music, and they had a yummy mac and cheese bar that Chamblee devoured:) It was a beautiful weekend! They are off to Jamaica- the best honeymoonin' spot in the world- today. Hooray!

I went to middle school with 2 of the other 3 bridesmaids- it was SO fun to see and hang out with those girls!!! It has been such a long time. B's Matron of Honor is 7 months pregnant, and I am 5, so it was fun to talk about baby stuff and poke bumps back and forth. She is having a boy, so we planned their lives as either boyfriend/girlfriend or besties already. I can't believe we are all grown up, married and having babies. It almost feels like we are playing house. . . but for real.

Here are some pictures from the weekend- Once Facebook decides to play nice I will upload the rest. It is giving me serious attitude!









Congrats to the newlyweds!

Until Next Time,
The Guff

MBO+CSC= L-O-V-E

I really wish Bailey would stop crying. I think he sees me packing things up and assumes I am leaving him again. Ever since my summer out west, he has had some serious, serious separation anxiety. I am not going far- but I am going to NASHVILLE!!! Actually, we are all going! (He hasn't quite caught on to the sight of his "luggage" yet. He just recognizes mine...)

We leave for Nashville tomorrow for a MUCH anticipated wedding weekend! One of my oldest and very dearest friends is getting married on Saturday! It is going to be a beautiful weekend. I have known this lady for years, and I think that the groom seriously lucked out. I mean, he's an awesome guy, but really, he got the better end of the deal. She is one of a kind. Honestly one of the funniest people that I know. One of the most genuine, always-stayed-true-to-herself, loyal and smartest people that I have ever met. And, they are so much fun together- it also helps that they look good together (you know it's true). She's going to be an absolutely radiant bride. I CAN'T WAIT!

Another fun little perk? One of my besties lives in Nashville, and has so graciously offered her home to us for the entire weekend. (And...by offered, I mean I asked, and she said yes.) That means I get to hang out with her a little, not sleep on a couch, and be able to bring our boys with us for the ride. It is so kind of her to move out for the weekend so we can stay. What can I say? I'm blessed with wonderful friends. AND I LOVE NASHVILLE! Thank goodness it's in Nashville and not like, Knoxville, and K will have a plethora of activities to enjoy while I am out getting mani/pedis and attending wedding-y things that he isn't invited to:)

After a long week of twisted, unexpected long hours and frustrating days at work- this weekend is just what I need. Friends, family, love, dancing, pampering and laughter. I'm so excited to be a part of her day. I love you, B!






Until Next Time,
The Guff

Greatest Comeback Story, Ever!

Luke 24:1-12

(1) But on the first day of the week, at early dawn, they went to the tomb, taking the spices they had prepared. (2) And they found the stone rolled away from the tomb, (3) but when they went in they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. (4) While they were perplexed about this, behold, two men stood by them in dazzling apparel. (5) And as they were frightened and bowed their faces to the ground, the men said to them, “Why do you seek the living among the dead? (6) He is not here, but has risen. Remember how he told you, while he was still in Galilee, (7) that the Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men and be crucified and on the third day rise.” (8) And they remembered his words, (9) and returning from the tomb they told all these things to the eleven and to all the rest. (10) Now it was Mary Magdalene and Joanna and Mary the mother of James and the other women with them who told these things to the apostles, (11) but these words seemed to them an idle tale, and they did not believe them. (12) But Peter rose and ran to the tomb; stooping and looking in, he saw the linen cloths by themselves; and he went home marveling at what had happened.

What a wonderful time of year. The beauty of the skies and the trees and the sunshine always reminds me of how much God loves us. And can you imagine- this is not what he intended? If we weren't in a fallen world, how much more beautiful it would be? It gets me excited about Heaven. My prayers lately have shifted, obviously, a lot towards Chamblee and her life as a Christian. I get so emotional thinking about my responsibility as not only a mother, but as a Christian mother, to her and her walk with God. I can only pray that she knows His love like I do, and has a strong and intimate relationship with Him. I get so nervous sometimes that I won't do a good job with that. The good news? "Because He lives, I can face tomorrow! Because He lives, all fear is gone! Because I know, I know he holds the future! And life is worth the living just because He lives!"

Happy Easter! I hope the Easter Bunny was good to you and yours, and that the sunshine reminds you of the real meaning of this day. As one of my friends said on Facebook, "It's the greatest comeback story Ever. HE IS RISEN!"

Until Next Time,
The (eternally grateful) Guff

Life is Good.

For those of you who were wondering, K made it home from his trip safe and sound. Crazy sobbing was totally unnecessary (Duh).

Today was beautiful, and pretty much perfect. I slept in, and then took the dogs for a longer morning walk than usual so K could sleep in even later. When he got up we decided that it was too nice not to go to Piedmont Park- and take the boys with us. It was warm, not hot, breezy and beautiful. We took some tunes, some snacks and a blanket. We walked around for a long time mostly talking about the future- whatever it holds- and people/dog watching. I love giving the boys a chance to explore around things that they aren't used to. Days like today also remind me how well behaved our dogs are. They don't bark, they dont bite and they don't tug. . . well, unless there's a cute little mini-poodle strutting by. I just thought today was wonderful. I love that I have Saturdays to enjoy and do with whatever I please; whether it be staying on the couch all day or getting out and smiling in the sun. Here are a few shots from the park:
Me with my sweet, sweet boys :)

Handsome Prince basking in the sun.
Staring down some fox, I'm sure.

Ok, even K says this picture is deceiving. I am not really that big...

My view from the blanket. Beautiful Day!


But, no seriously, I am not really that big. It's gotta be because he took the picture sitting down. Bad angle. Anyway.

This week Baby Guff is the size of a large banana! Whoa. No wonder I have been having trouble moving around lately. Mostly if I wanna switch sides that I am sleeping on. No more simply flipping over. It's a 3-step process. Roll to my back, roll to the other side, and re-adjust. I cannot even imagine how much work this will be in a couple of months. I mean, it has got to be impossible if I get any bigger. Which, I don't plan on doing. I figure if I have gone 5 months and only gained 6 ounces, well, at that rate I should only gain about...well, I don't do math. But I know it would be less than a pound by the time Cham gets here. That's my math, and my logic. I will just keep losing weight in other places to cover the weight of the baby:) I might get a little bigger, but maybe not. I mean, some people are really tiny when they have babies! (I do have a funny feeling this is all about to blow up in my face...See post next week about how incredibly devastated I am that I somehow gained 20 pounds in 7 days...)

Well now I am rambling.

I love sunshine, I love my dogs, I love my man and I love my Chamblee. Life is good.

Until Next Time,
The Guff