"I don't do that kind of help"

I don't do yard work. 

My Mimi? All over it.
My dad? Loves it.
My oldest brother? Lives for it.
K? Breathes it.

As my {oldest} charming niece once told me after I asked her to help me clean up a spilled bag of makeup, "I don't do that kind of help."

So, today, when I peeked out the window and saw K doing the yard work, I didn't feel a bit guilty. He loves it, I hate it. That's that. I kept tidying the house, swaying to BB King on Pandora and catching glimpse after glimpse of him out the window. Working hard. 

I guess I could ask. So I opened the front door and yelled, "Hey, need any help?" He paused. Looked around and said, "Nope" pretty confidently. At the risk of getting off too easy, I said, "You sure?" knowing he had evaluated the scene and would send me back inside to the smell of apple cider candles burning. "Well, you could help me bag these leaves." What. For real? "These leaves" You mean, those thousands of leaves? I can do this. 


So I headed down the driveway to help scoop up the leaves. It took less than 5 minutes. It's over, and I helped. Mission accomplished, good wife badge earned for the day.

"Hey, can you scoop up that other pile while I start on...." I don't. even know. what he said. There's more? Ok. I can do this. "Wait, you shouldn't be doing this." And he pointed to my belly. He thinks I'm a wuss because I'm 6 months pregnant. "Yeah, I'll do it. I'm not that pregnant." And I did. And then I went inside. Where it was warm. And smelled like apples baking.

I really was happy to help my husband. I just wish it was helping him do something else, is all.

As I started to write this blog it reminded me of something we have been reflecting a lot on in our Bible Study lately. Asking God to challenge our faith, to make it stronger. Because after all, we do want a stronger faith, right? I just don't want Him to challenge me in certain ways. I mean, I don't want Him to take anyone or anything away from me that I love or enjoy- just the small things. The things that I could surely stand to lose. But what good would that do? It's like asking K to let me help, but asking him to let me help him organize and color coordinate something. Sure, it's help, but it's no challenge for me. It's no sacrifice.

It's me saying to God, "I want you to use me, but not like that."  And I don't like the sound of me saying that to Him!

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you."

Deuteronomy 31:6

Until Next Time, 

The Guff